Control

This week I have been focusing on God and what he is trying to tell me about me, I have been keeping my eyes wide open. I have been blessed over and over this week. The truth is that I like to be in control of everything, not because I want to be a controling person but because I feel like I need to be on top of everything all the time as not to let my family down. I want to make sure my children are successful, I want to make sure my Husband has a good relationship with my children, I want to make sure I have a good relationship with my husband. Therefore I am always evaluating how I can change what I am doing, what my husband is doing and what my kids are doing to assure they are on the right track. IT is a huge weight to carry. I was doing all this because I was not TRUSTING that God had my back. Don't get me wrong, I realize a person still needs to make good choices. But the point is that really although you can guide your children, you can share what you feel is right with your husband, they are still their own people with their own minds...they have that pesky "Freewill" that God gave us. I can really only make choices for myself and know that God is working with them as well. The funny thing in all this is that this week, I have let go of so much. I have share with my children how I feel and continue to set boundaries for them, but I have been quick to listen, slow to anger, slow to speak with them. (Sound familiar..you can find it in the bible.), with my husband, I have let go and let him be the leader, I share with him ONE time what I might think or feel and let it go from there. If I worry that he is not leading, I remember that he loves me and the children and know he will always base his decisions on that and let it go. The truth is that my burden has been lifted and this has been the most amazing week with my family. I have witness whole family less stressed, have meaningful conversations. want to be in the same room all without my suggestion. My family is as "Perfect" as I have been working for and guess what... God is GOOD and GOD is always walking beside you.